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A Crap Guide to D&D [5th Edition] – Goblins
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“Who are constantly angry because someone stole their art off instagram”
I’ve been called out
“but this is d&d where everyone breaks the rules more than in an episode of Yu-Gi-Oh” THAT HURT ME HARRRRDDDDDDDD
What was the point of that?
@vigen the gamer It’s a spam bot, they have been posting replies with video links all over these comments, just report it
Screw the rules I have money!
The fact there is more room on that shelf should bring us hope in these dark times.
@Joshua Sanders …Toilet paper mimics! The only predators of modern day humans!
@Grayson Chandley Ah the horror
@Trevor S I have the stat block for building mimics. This is some Haunted House movie shit here brother.
Dragon plushie? Plz?
“… and being overall superior to kobolds in every way!”
Well, kobolds can always call their *dragon* . Who your goblins are going to call?
Also,
Little tinkering multicoloured reptiles > Little barbaric green hairless apes
every day of the week.
They call the warhost blessed by magluviath
@bluefootwalking You do realise that this particular trick works only against those who are *_bigger_* than you, but not so big that you cannot reach them? -_-
They’re gonna call ghostbusters, duh?
@A_Guy_in_Orange Only if said dragon is a _dracolich_ .
Either the goblin hordes or whoever has bullied them enough to be their ‘daddy’.
Alternatively, their chosen god blessed patrons who run around as jesters and generally are so painful to deal with that being mobbed by them is like being coated in small tiny cuts, a lemon bath, then run around in full plate until you got them all.
DM: So, you enter in the dungeon and you find an horde of creatures.
Player: what creatures are they?
DM: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhh, goblins.
Player: again?
DM: Yes
Player: there’s a meaning for this?
DM: Yes
Player: then, why?
DM: Yes
Player: what does It mean?
DM: Yes
My DM does the same thing with undead
@Slime I hate you bots
“…And make the enemies’ voice go up as many octaves as your player level” :Person getting punched my a lvl 20 goblin proceeds to break the sound barrier:
Step aside, Peasant Railgun, another silly exploiting of the rules has arrived!
Wait, what? Octaves are pitch, decibels are volume: and the sound barrier is a impulse made when something goes faster than the speed of sound, so that doesn’t have anything to do with volume or pitch.
“and generally better than kobolds in every way”
Boy, them’s fightin’ words.
Just wait till my Kobald Hexadin gets his hands on you
Kobold Krew, unite!
Kobolds are the best encounter when used properly CHANGE MY MIND
Then you will die braver than the rest
*Immediately insulted that Kobolds are declared inferior then Goblins, when clearly Kobolds are sub-master race, just behind dragons.*
@Draeckon Please report for spam.
The Kobold God is the only reason the Gods of the Forgotten Realms are still alive.
@Dracosfire 7 i mean, aren’t all races alive because of their respective gods?
BocataDeClavos I mean the Gods specifically. They were all nearly killed by the Titan Kronos, but the Kobold God hatched a plan and got the Gods to work together to trap him in some incredible illusion magic.
Hmmmmmmmmmmm………
[makes a kobold-goblin hybrid on HeroForge to show my DM]
I just want to say one thing: InCase Goblins.
God I think I might regret googling what Incase is…
@Zaktot1357 An artist that produces mainly NSFW content. With certain kinks…
Ho boy now we’re talking about peak culture
What about CoC?
They add bump to the grind in that old game.
Somebody had to say it first O7
“Superior to Kobolds in every way”
My friend has a Kobold Tank who is made of absolute ChONk who would like to have some words with you.
don’t think I didn’t see that Berd cameo
Personally I love kobolds way more than goblins:
– They have close connections to dragons which are way more wicked than war wolves and hobgoblins
– I always enjoyed the kinda scaly-lizard monsters because reptile people are cool and interesting (if only the dungeon guide books let us have more than a few paragraphs of lore before sending us to go find the rest from other sources)
– It’s GREATLY entertaining to work with the twisting tunnels, crazy inventions, creative traps, and other elements they revolve around (some of but not all of which apply to goblins as well)
– I also homebrew them in my campaigns to have different colors and abilities related to the dragon they serve
meanwhile goblins make me feel like i’m looking at something i’ve seen a thousand times by now no matter what ridiculous shenanigans they DM has them get up to.
Agreed, although I think “kobolds get dragons as friends” actually highlights one of the better things about golbins; they can get whatever they can tame/trick/enslave as ‘friends’ which could make for a nasty surprise for your players. They think they’re up against trash gobs with the occasional rogue or cleric or hobgoblin mixed in and then bam, domesticated owlbear.
…challenge accepted.
“Cannon fodder”
*That’s a bold statement for someone in Booyahg distance.*
“I guess I’m too tough to cry”
“Last week you were crying about those goblin plushies”
“They don’t have any arms…”
I feel like your comment is under apricieated
*sigh* Steven
Ha, universe classic.
“People have a weird fetish for goblins. Now buy a goblin plushy!” I have a bad feeling about this.
my plans are beyond your understanding, mortal
“and generally better than kobolds in every way”
*twitter disliked that*
Ok ya same
Think of it like this: Your granting them death.
*Sunlight Sensitivity and -2 str intensify*
‘BOLD words, eh? Eh?
Imagine if 4 Kobold rogues attack one PC, they are ALL getting there Stealth attack bonus DESPITE BEING CLEARLY VISIBLE.
Madness.
Just Fireball