Is This Gears Of War Ripoff Talking Down To Me? (Squirty Play)

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Well, I found myself a highly amusing Gears of War clone to play, one with voice acting so slow and precise, it genuinely feels like it’s patronizing you. Let’s go!

#MARS #GearsOfWar #ThirdPersonShooter #Shooter #JimSterling #PC #Microtransactions #SquirtyPlay


  1. Can we talk about the 8″ heels on litterally the first NPC you see in this military base.

  2. Oh god i lost it when that AI-companion just slid/crawled away

  3. Cap'n Chumpington Esq.

    Gears of War would’ve been 10x better if Marcus Phoenix had a thong sticking out of his fridge armour

  4. Okay, we now need PEGGING to be a standard issue Jimquisition meme alongside SKELETON WARRIORS and pictures of shrimp.

  5. You can tell Emma was voiced by the dev’s mum.

  6. Doctor Emilynn is just wonderful. I want her in every game.

  7. 16:19 is where the highlight of this game Ema Lynn makes her debut.

  8. All the voice actors do their best text to speech impression.

  9. Doctor Evil Lyn: (dumps expository technobabble at Warp Eleventy-Million).

    Also Doctor Evil Lyn: We… Must… STOP…them. Fol…low. Me.

  10. Emma’s line readings remind me of someone doing a humorous impression of a Norwegian accent. Like an SNL character.

  11. That’s a military standard issue thong. Finally, realism in video games!

  12. I actually feel bad about criticizing this game. The effort and production quality that went into this is leagues above the normal trash we see. That dude doing the voice acting in the first scene wasn’t even universally bad.

    If this was a ps2 game we’d be saying it was fairly average

  13. I have seen a lot of Squirty Plays, love the series, think this one might be my favorite. Thank you for introducing me to Dr Emma Lynn, oh glorious queen of M.A.R.S.~

  14. that sudden infodump fucking took me out, this is a comedic masterpiece even if it’s a shit video game

  15. Steph: “Those are big ants!”
    Me: “When did this turn into EDF?”
    Steph: “Just when I thought this game was bad!”
    Me: “I wonder if they ever played EDF…”
    Steph: “EE! DEE! EPH! EE! DEE! EPH!”
    Me: “I guess they did!”

  16. I will say I’m impressed that they took the opportunity to basically shove the camera up the ass of your character every single chance they got.

  17. Holy shit this is gold. Imagine an entire game of patronizing NPC escort missions and we’ll have the best content Youtube has seen in decades.

  18. So good to watch a video with the Steph x Justin power dynamic in full effect, these cuts are great, the commentary is funny, I just love Squirty Plays so much <3

  19. You know you’re in for a treat when the main character has the fashion sense of Hardy Boyz era Lita

  20. RIP Mac Miller, you helped me with a lot

    “Is he one of the legendary members from Alpha squad?” sounds a lot like when Carmine asked Marcus “Are you _thee_ Marcus Fenix? From Aspho Fields?”

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