How Nintendo Can Make Up For Being Total Dickheads (The Jimquisition)




Look, we all know about the NES Classic’s discontinuation by now. That’s not worth rehashing.

Instead, let’s heal these wounds and look at the ways in which Nintendo could show it truly was sorry. That’s what Reggie said. He said they were sorry.

The Jimquisition is ready to forgive… with conditions.

Bonus Content: Oh, Ubisoft!

19 Comments:

  1. TheFriendlyBroski

    *Have a good day everyone.*

  2. What are you doing Jim? I can already hear the hordes of angry Nintendo fanboys.

  3. OMG! He’s kid now! Or wait… Is he a squid now?

    I’m really confused.

    P.S. Am I the only one excited to hear the Chains of Love?

  4. Alexey Stolovoy

    Nothing better than being pulled out of masturbation by a Jim Sterling upload!

  5. Release Mother 3 and continue remaking all the Japanese Fire Emblem games.

    Boom, second wind!

  6. Lets sell an awesome Nintendo classic but only make 7 of them, then discontinue it 6 months later…. FUCK YOU NINTENDO

  7. Life’s better when you’re a TV that looks like an apple.

  8. You know people like to defend Nintendo taking ad revenue from you tubers, well how about this you buy some lemons from a farmer and make some lemonade with it. You sell the lemonade, then the farmer comes out of nowhere and says you need to give them a part of the money you got if you want to carry on selling lemonade. You say n- whoops you’ve been sued and your lemonade stand has been burned down.

  9. Best game on Switch is a lazy port…

  10. “…to date, the best game on the Nintendo Switch.”
    10/10 stealth troll.

  11. I am honestly starting to worry that Nintendo will become my Konami, i.e. a company I used to love and respect but which has systematically made itself an industry joke. I’m a lifelong fanboy and I don’t want to hate Nintendo, but it’s getting kind of embarrassing now.

  12. Nintendo: downloading roms are ILLEGAL!
    People: ok sure can i buy the classic NES?
    Nintendo: NO YOU CANT! WHERE NOT LETTING YOU!

  13. It’s called the Nintendo Entertainment System Classic, so it makes sense that the business model would be…

    **puts on sunglasses**

    …Classic Nintendo

  14. If you make it hard to get your console by limiting the supply (don’t want to buy from 3rd party) then people are going to pirate your shit. There is already a Wii U emulator (CEMU) out which can play flagship games like BotW and we will get one for Switch.

  15. Sagan ist krieg

    Seriously, a catapult? Pathetic.

    A trebuchet can launch a 90kg projectile over 300m dontchaknow

  16. Why the fuck would a 10 year old want an NES classic?
    Only hipsters and 30+ nostalgia freaks [and collectors 😉 ] want that thing.

  17. Life’s good, when you’re POUNDING IT 11:04

  18. Jim, this is a subpar video with subpar arguments. I mean, I wait weekly for your stuff because you typically rant very well, but oftentimes your satire is lacking, and this is one of those cases. Which is disappointing, considering that I won’t get another Jimquisition until Monday next weeks, so… damn.

    Anyway, I think its pretty clear that they cancelled the NES classic so they could sell more digital titles on the switch. They’re pumping out the New 2ds because they don’t believe its over yet. They’re coming out with new fire emblem games and I wouldn’t be surprised if they announced more titles for the damn immortal portable this coming e3. And while I’m ready for them to move on with it, I imagine they do it because its all gravy profit for them as far as the 3ds tech and library goes. Tangent to that comment, I think they’d be a lot better off if they just finished up with the 3ds and focused on bringing games with more portable-friendly design to the switch as a way of boosting the library and portable use-cases.

    Anyhow, you’re really unnecessarily harsh on Nintendo, especially since they’re the only ones with the right ideas in terms of how to move forward in the industry. While Sony and Microsoft (cool guys, I agree) are futilely trying to compete with the PC market, Nintendo is generating niche hardware and new creative gaming ideas that you legitimately can’t find on the PC. Its not competing in the raw power cage match, its supplementing the industry on a whole by actively being different. I think that this leads to a lot of frustration because the ways that they fuck up are so obvious and you want them to perform the fundamentals better because they’re the only one’s with any potential, but I think its damn important to acknowledge that they’re the only one’s with any damn potential first and foremost.

    I’m not trying to be the guy that says “everybody but Nintendo is worthless” because that’s not the case, not yet anyway. But I do find it annoying that you’ve started a hate-campaign over some of the most nitpicky shit. I have a friend who has basically been indoctrinated by this into thinking that they’re the worst company in gaming right now. Its a fucking absurd and pathetic application of reasoning befitting the saltiest of CoD fagbois.

  19. Veganism is a moral imperative

    Huh, so Jim’s a squid now.

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